Oh Gee This is so much FUN!!!

So I had the choice to either attend a 3yr old birthday party, or a baby shower. Actually I really had no choice. Hubby took the son to the b-day party of screaming 2 and 3 yr olds fighting over who opens the presents and who gets the biggest peice of cake, and I was lucky enough to be the one who had to drive an hour & a half away for a shower of a girl that I always thought hated me and that I have only seen MAYBE 5 times in my life. How then did I get invited...b-friends sister is the one having the tater tot. Atleast I knew 3 people. The games were a little more fun this time, but the majority of this party was 2 hours of opening gifts. Then her mother says "OOOHHOOHHH we have one more game and Elnora HAS to play this one... I am volonteering her!!" giggle giggle snort snort! The game....who can suck apple juice out of a baby bottle the fastest. I don't know if you know this...especially you RWA... sucking anything out of a baby bottle takes alot of work...or should I say "skills"....so WHY was I the first one who posessed these skills? Especially by the mother of the group.....Ang, have you been sharing stories?

You might as well know...

I have been a little pre-occupado lately..work has been busy, which is a great thing and my mind has been settled on other things. You'll find out sooner or later with a post here and there so here it is...Hubby and I are trying to have another baby. Have been for a month now. While it is tons of fun , the waiting game is killing me. See baby #1 was a wonderful surprise, so there was no waiting involved. I feel like I am the only one in the world unable to concieve. So I logged on to research alittle about getting sperminated. Here are some of the tips they suggest:

Cut out caffine: Try switching to a milkshakes which will boost your calcium as well and assist in conception. (how will a milkshake assist in conception)

Also, try stress management techniques, such as yoga and meditation, which research suggests can also help in getting pregnant.

Buy something sexy: Some experts say that if a woman is highly aroused while she's having sex, the sperm has a better chance of fertilizing her egg. Other researchers don't agree. (this helps how)

The woman can try elevating her hips with a pillow so her cervix is exposed to the maximum amount of semen. (then they suggest laying there elevated for 30 minutes after sex, eeew!)

Make your vaginal environment as sperm-friendly as possible. (okay, I'll buy it some roses and give her a little sweet talk, maybe if she's good I'll take her out for dinner) WTF???

What happened to the good ole' fashioned..getting it on and getting pregnant. Why does this seem like such work, ovulation strips, a bbt thermometer, ovulation calender, positions...the list goes on.
This is not going to turn into a mommy blog....I promise...or a I wanna get preggers thing either, I just thought I would share some of the stupid shit out there to get women's hopes up. For me and hubby...the good ole fashioned getting it on, will have to do for now.

Race for the cure

I will be up bright and early at 5 am tomorrow morning. Hubby, Son and I are going to participate in the Susan G. Komen race for the cure. Cancer has deeply effected my family on so many levels. We have suffered loss as well as triumphed through recoveries. I race to not only protect my future, but I race to honor those who can no longer fight, because I never veiw it as lost battle. Please keep me and my family in your thoughts tomorrow, as well as the millions that will be walking beside me and the millions looking down cheering us on from heaven.
If you would like to donate, my link is on my side bar.
Thank you.
Love,
Elnora

Ha Ha It's so tickley in here!!!

So there I was in good ole' Walmart minding my own business and this annoying redneck is blabbing into her phone, being sure to be as loud as she can so everyone can here, "You know what I got in my cart???" She repeats that twice so of course I had to look and I beheld the must get of the season, a stack of Tickle Me Elmo TMX's. I know the bitch didn't have that many kids, but that was before they posted the 2 elmo limit sign! So of course, I had to see what the fuss was about and headed over to the toy aisle. All alone was one golden elmo. When I picked up the box it started to giggle and tell me how tickley it was in there. At that moment, my son grabbed the box and held on for dear life. So I though, find a price scanner, if it isn't too much I'll buy it. After my endless search to no avail, This lady comes running after me "MAAM, exuse me MAAM!!" I am only 29, so I KNOW she wasn't talking to me, then I hear "MAAM>>MAAM! Did you get that here", no dummy, I let my kid bring an unopened elmo in the store so he could play with the box, "yes, but I got the last one." her reply, " Do you want it? I have a daughter that wants one so badly?" ugg now you have graduated from dummy to , dumbass #*^%^*! Can you not see the kid holding the damn thing? "I think we will be buying it", her reply, "well if you decided not to, please come find me in the toy aisle, I will be hunting for another one" Sure I will, I've seen these things on ebay, I tell ya what, you give me $100 and I will let you buy it from me before you buy it from Walmart!

Then when I brought the thing home, the adults had more fun with it than my son did. If you have see what it does, you would understand
Here is what elmo does! TICKLE ME ELMO

The Money Pit!

Being in Real Estate, I consider myself somewhat knowledgable when it comes to home buying. But I think when things become personal, all good judgement goes out the window. We have been in our new house since December 31st. We walked into the transaction having about 35k to put down, 76k to buy furniture, do some small fix ups, and some $ for savings. "Fix up" is not the word so far.
This transaction was so F'd up it was unbelievable. There were 6 sellers on the property that were money hungry greedy no do gooders. The primary owner was a realtor that bought the house 8 months prior and tried flipping it for 100k. They couldn't sell the mug to save their lives and ended up losing money. When hubby and I saw the house, we thought, this is where we will grow old. We moved in, and immediately, The fire place needed conditioning and inspecting due to some melted sheathing in the attic, speaking of the attic, we found 3 holes in the roof, the tractor blew and we had to buy a new one, the dryer started emulating a warm orange glow from behind, so the thought of our home burning down...ummm we went and bought a new dryer. Then in the dead of winter the thermostat went, when we replaced it, it blew the furnace, so we had to run out and buy a new freakin furnace. Then the beautiful 40ft cottonwood tree in our front yard never bloomed. So this weekend hubby and friend cut it down. It was a great site to see. Ty and I ran out in our pj's cuddled in blankets and stood in the neighbors yard. With one WHACK! you her "crack, crackin, crackle, cracking" And the 40ft beauty slowly started to lean. Hubby and friend took a few steps back, hearts skipping beats, when the tree picked up momentum and "SLAM!" Branches went flying everywhere as they hit the ground. It was the coolest sound ever. My son yelled to the tree "Bye Bye tree" "I lus you!". I felt bad. One of the wonders of this home was gone.

Now the money pit has reminded us of three more expenses, paying a grinder to grind the stump from the tree, the washing machine has now blessed us with a wonderful burning odor, and the water softener has now stopped softening.... But I am now the proud owner of a beautiful white woman's blond afro/dread locked/mop on my head! Atleast I walked away with something....certainly not pride.