Wednesday, April 26, 2006

You know what erks fat!!!

I hate to toot my own horn, but I used to be hot... Before child birth. I am working on it though. But what the F*** is my problem? I tried the diet thing then fell off the wagon after seeing no results! I even went to a work out class once, but I felt like I needed to sponsor half the women in there at McDonalds or something. I wanted to have a t-shirt made that said "feed her" with and arrow -> . I had to quit that b/c I have never been the fat girl in class and I wasn't going to start now! So my hubby goes out and buys me an Elliptical. It's nice too...It has a fan and all these different programs and he propped it in front of the TV. But lets get hubby didn't go buy me time. I use to wait tables and bartend all day, walk miles on campus everyday and grabbed din din at the night club. Now I sit behind a desk and have barely enough time to shower b/c life gets in the way. So I go into the dreaded elliptical room and stare at the mean machine. I step up to the plate...turn it out for a minute and the baby starts crying. Take care of that. Go back and work out for a minute....damn this is just too much work! This thing is evil I tell ya. No wonder they came up with ways to suck the fat outta ya. It is so much less time consuming. But I will be honest with you...I have an aunt in Cali that really needs to cut with the plastic...she is starting to get a beard from all the face lifting (use your imagination)
So I wonder how do these other women do it?? I have a friend from college who weighs less now that before the baby. SAY WHAT?
At least I have the pictures to prove that I once was the shit. How else would I have snagged such a handsome man and had such a beautiful son!
Please comment on what erks you.


Indeterminacy said...

COngratulations on winning our battle! I like your ambition (to vecome a children's book writer. I hope you make it!)

Don said...

ROFLMAO, well I wish I was laughing it OFF, but definetly laughing hard. Glad my post" got you writting here too. :)

The only thing I found to work so far in equipment is the AB Lounge you see on TV. I put it right in front of the TUBE, and when I watch my movies (I rarely actually watch TV) (and I have over 350 movies at the house) I do the AB lounge thing and it has helped a LOT!! I have a 2 pack ab right now, from one BIG one (you can see it sorta here. I'm the big guy in the first picture of the set, with the mostly bald head and sun glasses stearing the boat, one guy to my right, your left, in blue and one to my left, your right in white.) That belly is down some now. :)