Monday, April 30, 2007

It's Over!!!

After a conversation with my mother, I decided to re-think the argument with hubby. My mother is totally on my side, but something she said made me think about the purchases that hubby and I have made over the last year, which include a 50" dlp television & a Charlse Fazzino peice of artwork. Those were joint decision purchases, that had we not made, we might have a bit to buy the car we need. SO I told hubby I was setting the fight aside, but that he needed to help me out and make the other car happen. I can't punish him for decisions we have both made.
Besides...he is too damn cute to stay mad at for long!

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Aids in Africa

So I watched the telethon for American Idol. It focused on the poor in America and the poor in Africa. I hate watching things like that on TV, especially about Africa, because my heart breaks for all the children and you feel helpless and like maybe a little guilty for what you have. Hubby and I were talking, and I thought to myself, really what could I do? If every american gave a donation, it still wouldn't be enough to stop the Aids epidemic over there. It would go towards the medicines they need to substain life. My husband said that until they stopped procreating the Aids epidemic would keep spreading. I, personally, don't even think that it has to do with unprotective sex any more. It is a combination of living conditions, sterility, sex, ritual, education and lack of medical care.

It's hard to believe that we haven't found a cure yet.
Here is a link to learn more about the aids epidemic in Africa. I must warn you, it is graphic.
You can go here to donte to the American Idol Gives Back fund.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

American Idol...Inspirational?

I never thought that I could be inspired by American Idol. Tonight they did "Idol gives back". They are helping poverty stricken cities in the United States and Africa. One of the idols sang..Imagine, by John Lennon.

I thought to myself... Can you believe that John Lennon died over this belief:

Imagine there's no Heaven

It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today
Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace
You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one
Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world
You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Just a thought...

Why is it, that my brother can spend 6 years in the Marines, 1 tour in Africa and 2 tours in Iraq, then when he comes home... he can't get a job?

He has been trying since before Christmas to get a government job, and the government will not hire him?

I wonder how wide spread this is....

Friday, April 20, 2007

My baby is beautiful!

My daughter, Emma Josephine, waved and said hello for the sonogram yesterday. We ran into some complications that make her high risk now. However, Michael and I are optimistic. We love her too much already to think the worst. I will try to post her sonogram pics later...if I can figure out how to work the scanner.

You can check out her issue here. Two Vessel Umbilical Cord

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Does my vote even count?

I am sorry to be so political lately. I can't help it. For the first time in my life I have felt like my vote will make the difference that this country needs. It has always bothered me that the voters in the electorial college do not nessecarily have to vote the way the state had, but for the most part they do. UNTIL NOW!
Our wonderful (democratic) governor O'Mally just signed a Maryland law/bill that makes my head spin. You can read the article here, but the gist is...
Maryland is now going to be the first state that will give it's electorial votes away to the presidential cantidate that leads in the national race, instead of the way the voters have voted. Since Maryland is a Democratic state, for the most part, it could be a good thing for Republicans, but still, I would much rather have my vote count.

When I read the article, it makes me wonder if the law even matters, or would impose b/c apparently a certain amount of the states have to do the same thing for the law to take effect. But for Maryland to be the leader...grrr.

Why can't we just leave well enough alone. The general population already has it's qualms with our voting process now, and now we have to say...let's throw out the people's vote? I don't think that this is what our founding fathers had in mind.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

The argument

So the other day I did a post about blowing my top.
I don't normally post personal stuff, but this one is eating me. SO I am going to post the argument.
Most of you know I am five months pregnant and that this has been a very difficult pregnancy. What you don't know, is that Hubby and I have one vehicle for the family. Hubby drives a work van that is only allowed for work, and we own a 1955 ford100. The Ford sits on the side of my drive, rusting, it is only a two seater, is leaking oil, none of the gages work and the trans is slipping.
With another baby on the way, we really need another family car, but can't afford a monthly payment. If we bought one, it would have to be cash. Husband refuses to sell the junk Ford that serves no purpose in order to help me out. What is the big deal you might ask. Well I tote our two year old everywhere. To and from everyday without the help of my husband. He sometimes gets off work early and it would be so nice if he could pick our son up from daycare early. Not only would it be easier on me, but our son would love the extra time home with daddy.
We recently had a car issue, that I am still dealing with. Since it is our only car, I had to get a rental, tote our son, his car seat, stroller in between 3 cars getting the rental and picking our car up when it was ready. Doing it by myself and pregnant with a 2 yr old, was no piece of cake. Today I am without a car, hoping that it is ready before my work day is over b/c I have to get our son from daycare by 5pm. Hubby calls today to ask if I want to go to lunch b/c he got home at 11 today. 'I HAVE NO CAR'. Everytime something like that comes up I think to myself how much easier life would be with another car. I think of all I am willing to sacrafice for my family and how my husband can't sacrafice this one thing. But I don't want to be the bitch wife that says "DO IT NOW", I want him to do it for his family. So I get more upset, and more depressed and it just keeps going and going..

His brilliant response to me over the weekend....
"Didn't you think about that before you wanted another baby?"

You don't even want to know the evil thoughts that swarmed my head at that moment.

Update: Full to the fire
Well today, I had a major scare. I was having cramps early in the day...and slowly they became harder and I became scared and called to see the doctor. Well, my car was in the shop and I had no way to get there. So I had to call my husband and wait 15 mintues for him to come and pick me up in his work van. The ride to the doctor was very uncomfortable. And the more and more I thought about it, the more I became upset and cried even more. Turns out I pulled the ligament on the left side of my uterus and it will take time to heal. SO I have to take it easy, no lifting or sudden movements...I gues the doctor forgot I had a toddler. Not so easy. Did husband get it...of course not.
After the doctor, I had to go pick the car up. If we had another vehicle, hubby could of picked my son and I up and I wouldn't of had to worry about anything. So is my life.

Monday, April 16, 2007

My taxes to pay for your abortion?

I am going to be very clear. I do not believe in abortions other than for medical reasons. BUT that is my personal belief. I would never condemn a woman for having an abortion. But I will be damned if I would ever help pay for it. With the fine lines we have drawn in the abortion debate, how can a presidential hopeful support the public funding of abortions? He says it is a constitution right. But isn't the right to life, also a constitutional right. That is where the debate begins. When is life, life? That question is more a belief than is a proven and definitive fact.

When I decided to start having sex, I made the conscience decision to protect myself b/c I was not ready for a baby. If I didn't have the $3 for a condom, or the $20 bucks for birth control pills, I didn't take the chance and 'hope' that I didn't get pregnant.

Former Mayor Giuliani, and 2008 Presidential hopeful, believes that poor women should have access to our taxes to pay for their abortions. He didn't say if there would be a cap on abortions. He didn't say what classified poor. He didn't give an annual figure of how much it might cost. He didn't mention the public funding of birth control as an alternative... he said that whether I liked it or not, I was denying someone their constitutional right to an abortion by not wanting to have my tax dollars go towards something I whole heartily do not believe in. I think that the uproar in the United States, if something like that were to be passed, would be huge. He says he doesn't believe in abortion and thinks that it shouldn't be allowed, but in the same sentence, says he supports public funding....

Way to play both sides of the fence there Giuliani!

The article is here:Giuliani stands by support of publicly-funded abortions
Watch the video.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

I wasn't going to go there....

Don Imus was fired from his radio talk show from the station MSNBC. During a show he was commenting about the New Jersey's Rutgers Basketball team calling them "Nappy Headed Ho's".

The conversation started talking about the Rutgers big win, when Bernard McGuirk, Imus' executive director, commented, "that's some hard-core ho's there." Imus replied "That's some Nappy Headed Ho's there". It was meant to be a joke. I can understand how being on the radio you are going a mile a minute and could say things in the heat of the conversation then go "shit did I just say that". Your live on air, can you take it back, no. Does that mean he should not have been He deserved the suspension. But it was the use of the word "nappy headed" that got him in trouble. It was okay for the executive director of the show to call them ho's. Grey's Anatomy star Isaiah Washington got away with calling the gay community 'faggots'. Did he get fired...No! I guess the gay community doesn't deserve any respect or justice either.

I think because he was an old white guy with a cowboy hat, the fall out came alot faster and alot more damaging to him than would have someone of color. If the radio show host was black I don't think we would be having these conversations. There is a double standard. The fallout comes primarily through news outlets. Most people didn't even hear the context or inflection of the conversation. It was television that exploded the issue.

Al Sharpton, Reggie Jackson, heads of the NAACP and the Rutgers players have called way more attention to this than should be. Yes, as a talk show host, you have a responsibility to your public, but you also have free speech. It was meant as a joke, you could listen to it, and know it was a joke and not meant to intentionally harm anyone.
Last year's most critically praised comedy, Borat: won Sacha Baron Cohen a Golden Globe for playing a Kazakh journalist who calls Alan Keyes a "genuine chocolate face" and asks a gun-shop owner to suggest a good piece for killing a Jew.

As Imus pointed out, Al Sharpton is so quick to get him fired, but has Al Sharpton ever come out and apologized to the Duke Players that were prosecuted, judge publicly, and setenced before they even got a trial by Al Sharpton and others in the NAACP, for the alleged rape of a black stripper. They were released, charges dropped, and their lives ruined all because of a false accusation.

I hate saying it, but there is a huge double standard in America. I am sick of being labeled because I am white. I have been discriminated against because I am white. I have been punched for no reason by a perfect stranger in front of my 89 year old grand mother, because I was white. A woman in the African Museam in DC didn't want to help me because I was white, I have been called a white honkey, a white bitch. I had a gun pointed at my head by a black man in college and when the officer came to file the report, his reaction..."of course you would say it was a black man, your white in a black neighborhood, why are you even here". Most would never guess that my minor in college was African Literature or that my senior thesis was on African Tribal Ritual. My beliefs are assumed already because of the color of my skin. But the majority of my nationality is made up of some of the most historically racially prosecuted peoples.

I agreed with the suspension of Imus, his comments were insensitive and inappropriate. But to ruin the guy's career, over something that he really didn't mean to hurt or offend... I think goes a little too far. I hope CBS doesn't follow in the footsteps.

UPDATE: CBS decided to be pricks and get on the bandwagon and fired Don Imus. A man that is in the broadcasting hall of fame.
Wow. So when will Washington get fired for calling gays faggots? I guess that won't happen..he isn't an old white guy.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Congratulations Larry...the baby's daddy!

As if there were any doubt...Larry Birkhead is the biological father of the Late Anna Nicole's daughter, Dannilynn. Finally this man will be able to hold and love this child just like any other child born in this world deserves to be held and loved. Congratulations Larry. I pray that the return of your daughter to you is a swift and painless process!

Friday, April 06, 2007

Something nice just in time for Easter

British Soldiers were returned home. Thank you!
Happy Easter Everyone. Don't forget to take time out and remember the gift that was given to you this holy weekend. The pain and suffering that was endured so that we may live.
Not a sermon, just a thought.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Blowing your top

Did you ever get so angry with your significant other, you just blew up? Bigger than you ever thought that you could? You try to stop yourself but you just keep going and going with no self control...
How do you kiss and make up when there are issues that need to be dealt with? Especially when you became such an unbelievable bitch...anything you say can be held against you because of your last nights behavior?
Marriage, it's work. I want to kiss and make up, but there was an underlying issue that caused me to blow up. I love my hubby dearly, and I don't want to fight. It doesn't really solve anything, but I don't want to go first in the making up either. What a shitter of a mess!

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Too close to home...

I don't know what could posess someone to kill their children, but in the last month there have been two cases very close to home that have made news headlines. Last night a man killed his two children and then himself at a farm near my home. My sister in law knows the family and is devastated. If you want to kill yourself, I don't say "oh go ahead..." but I would say that before you harm your innocent 1 & 3 year old. The news story is here.

Then last month, again, near my home, a couple's 4 children were found murdered in their beds and their father was hanged in the home. The mother is missing, so police don't know if she is the murderer or if the father did something to her then his children. The story is found here.

I don't know what type of mind set you have to be in to commit such an awful and unforgiving act. It blows my mind when people hurt children, especially the parents. We are their protectors, the children look to us to take care of them.
I really can't find the words to express how I feel.

Before I knew about the first story, I took my son to the park last night. I watched him play and run around so carefree and unknowing of the dangers in this world. Then I noticed a man sitting by himself, no children. I wondered what he was doing there. I then got this horrible fear that someone could try to snatch my child up from me. I watched him play and noticed how unbelievably beautiful he was. My fears grew. There is so much in the world we as parents have to be leary and aware of. It shouldn't be like that. But it is... and it brings saddness to my heart.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

A Joke for today.

I was at the mall the other day eating at the food court. I noticed an old man watching a teenager sitting next to him.
The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange and blue. The old man kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find the old man staring every time.
When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"
The old man did not bat an eye in his response, "Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son."