YOU KNOW WHAT ERKS ME

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

You have been a great Friend


We still have not been able to figure out what is wrong with our Dakota. He has lost more weight and has started to deteiriorate again. We are hoping that weening him off the steriod is affecting his mood, and it's not a flare up of the muscles again.
The more I study our friend and search for possible conditions he might have, it seems to me that the diagnosis of Meningitis might be wrong. The more I research, it looks like Systemic Lupus Erythematosus. It is the worst kind of Lupus to have.
Sometimes the dogs have always had it and it masks itself as allergies, with skin rashes and things, and so you always treat for that. Then something might happen to your pet, in Dakota's case, he caught Lymes Disease, and the Lupus flared up in full force. It is treatable to an extent, and it's never cured. Sometimes the Lupus is so bad it results in the loss of your pet. It seems that steriods are the only thing that control what ever disease Dakota might have. But now, the combination of steriods, antibiotics and auto immune suppresants are starting to effect Dakota's white blood cell count.

Michael and I in our hearts, are feeling that we are losing our Dakota. I never thought we would lose our friend so early. He is 6 years young. We haven't begun to spend the time with our pet that we want to. The talks of 'how long' do we let this go on for him ... are becoming more frequent. But neither of us wants to say 'enough' just yet. He is so beautiful. To not have him in our lives tears us apart. The other day, we were in Baltimore, and Tyler wanted a penny to make a wish in the fountain. I gave him a nickel and when he through it in he said, "I want our doggy better".
Dear God, Please make our Doggy better. It's just not time for him yet.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

It's Tuesday...(technically) but the start of the week

Soooo... I have stayed away from the politics for a bit. I thought it all a bit tiresome, HOWEVER, I do have to say something about this past Hillary debacle. During a recent interview Hillary states that she is staying in the race, doesn't understand the pressure to quit, states Bill won the race after California, and that R. Kennedy was assassinated during the June primary in California, so anything can happen.
While news reports are stating that Hillary was tired, blah blah, is looking past the comment and moving on. I think that it is a permanent scarlet letter in her campaign. ANY hopes of a dream ticket are far gone for Hillary.
Who the F*** in their right mind mentions assassination during a presidential race?
I think she should be arrested for the comment personally. What would be the charge, intent to incite. People are arrested all the time for inciting violence. If anything happens to Obama...it could be argued that Hillary put the word out.

Now I know that it has crossed my mind, that Obama is clearly one of the most endangered candidates ever in History. He is the first Black presidential 'nominee'. But it is an unspoken...no public figure should though talk about such things, reaching millions of television viewers, stirring up the kettle.

I am not voting for Obama, I don't like him really, but never ever would I want something to happen to the man. It would be devastating. What would that say about our country? Could you imagine the fall out from something happening to him? I don't even want to think about such things, but you I help it.
I am just going to put it out there...I would fear for my life in the days after. I would fear riots, I would fear united relations disintegrating even further. I would fear the fall of the election process. It would be one of the saddest days in our history. So many things could go wrong.

I can only hope that we are a far better society than I fear we are not. And I pray that every presidential candidate is safe and that this bickering between the democratic party will end. It isn't good for our country. Hillary...drop out.. it is the best thing for the United States. It isn't about what you want anymore. There is no high road to take here... you have lost, your country doesn't trust you, most loathe you, you are sick and need medication.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Monday, May 19, 2008

What's THAT?

So this weekend was eventful. We had several 'play dates' with some of my friends and my children's friends. On Saturday we went to the indoor water park.

Hubby had to put a life gaurd in his place that was screaming at a couple and their children. The life gaurd was getting angry b/c the couple was oddly enough, ignoring him. He kept yelling, all the while getting more frustrated and more rude with each breath. I guess he was pissed he was going to have to get his fat ass out of the chair and actually approach the people. When my husband tapped him and explained, "uh hey man, those people you keep screaming at...they're deaf".
Boy did he look like an ass.

We had been swimming almost an hour. My friend and I wanted our hubby's to jump the high dive and have the kids watch. so we were making our way out of the pool and I noticed something 'floating', but it was alot of a something. When I went to step out, I saw it was smeared all over the stairs and did my best to avoid it. I made my way to the life gaurd and calmly explained.. "Dude, I think someone pooped in the pool", the expression on this guys face and his reply of "Are you kidding me?" said it all. He jumped from his chair and started blowing on his whistle in a fury, pointing at the water signaling all the other life gaurds to evacuate the pool. A frenzy of parents, trying to avoid the mess while exiting ensued, as did a bunch of shrills from unhappy children.

So after that we made our way to the other pool with the high diving boards. Hubby and best friends Hubby were happily jumping. When Best friends hubby all of a sudden looked not so happy. Again another life gaurd confrontation...'Hey man, do you have any goggles"
The life gaurd looked a bit puzzled, "We might, why?" Chris then smiled and missing was his front tooth. He had a retainer with a temporary tooth on it until he could get a permanent from the dentist. They just suffered some hard times recently and he just hasn't had a chance to get this done.
The life gaurd said he was welcome to go dive for it, but it was 18.5 feet at the bottom.
So for the next half hour we sat there entertaining our 3 children, while Chris and Michael went on a tooth diving expedition. They finally found it.

So as soon as I went home, I felt all scummy and had to take a shower, who knows how much poo I got in my hair. I called my best friend and said to her "did you like totally have to go take a shower when you got home?" She said she was too tired... "ANG! you were swimming with poop and didn't shower you dirty ho!" ... She replied, "OMG you just made me feel totally dirty...I forgot that happened and I was so tired.. gross!"

Hahahahahahahahahaaa
On a Lighter Note... It was also my Birthday this past weekend. I turned 31. Yay for me! Time to start counting backwards.

Friday, May 16, 2008

New Kids on the Block, you make me feel old, Go Away



Dear New Kids on the Block
I see you have come out of retirement. ***News Flash*** They call it retirement for a reason. You are tone deaf, you are not fresh anymore, Jordan keep the glasses on baby you are cross eyed and it's unattractive.

Today you made me feel like the oldest fart. You were around when I was 16. The women screaming in the audience are older than me.

Have fun taking groupies back stage. Nothing like the smell of BenGay in the afternoon.

Love
El

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Couldn't let this one pass me up

Fantasia..you have brought me to life woman!
If you watched last nights American Idol..you will know what I mean. If not, the clip is below...turn your speakers up ya'll!!! The look on Simon's face at the end is p-r-i-c-e-l-e-s-s!!!


Now I must say this, my jaw hit the floor when I watched this, and then a bunch of WTF's flew out of my mouth. Although I think that Fantasia looked like a hot tranny mess...I couldn't help but wonder... I bet sitting in that audience..was AMAZING!

Monday, May 12, 2008

Global Warming

Has picked me up in a wind tunnel and thrown me underground where I met up with a talking beaver who made me breakfast with the veggies from my own garden.

Peace Out...for awhile anyway!

(or atleast till I have something better to say)
shit, only 59 posts away from 500, we will see how long this lasts

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Sacrifice

Do men really know?
They just don't get it sometimes.
Men might want to sit around and complain about women and how bitchy we are and jive like that, but if they knew the sacrafices we made for them, our children, our families in general... I think they might appreciate us more.

Every room of my home is decorated in family photos. Past and present. So room to room I am reminded of what I used to look like, how I look now. I am also reminded of the benefits of my sacrafice. The beautiful smiles of my childen lovingly glance back at me.

It's easy for men to wonder what happened to their 'perfect' wives but so hard for your wives (some of them) to accept the way they have become.

I have always wanted children, a home, and a husband. The perfect family unit. But no one ever told me that after children, my perky breasts would sag. That was until my OBGYN said during a visit that I might want to get a better bra so they didn't sag more after Emma was born. (thank you) No one ever told me I would end up needing surgery if I wanted my tummy to look 'normal' again.

No one ever told me I would 'need' make up b/c I haven't had a good nights sleep in 3 years.
No one ever told me, I would chop all of my hair off because I didn't have the time in the morning to 'do' it.
No one ever told me that I probably would never highlight my hair anymore b/c that means I would need time to touch it up every month.

Geesh I could go on and on...

So in short, no one ever told my husband these things either.

I guess I am a little bitter b/c with the ton of sacrafices I have made...I was hoping not to have to plan my own Mother's Day. But I am the mommy...so I have to do the planning of the plans.

It just seems a bit, unfair.

Monday, May 05, 2008

CHINESE SICK LEAVE: 'I NO COME WORK TODAY!!!'

Hung Chow calls into work and says, 'Hey, I no come work today, I really sick. Got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come work.'
The boss says, 'You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this, I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes everything better and I go to work. You try that.
Two hours later Hung Chow calls again. 'I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon......... You got nice house.'

Friday, May 02, 2008

The worst fashion trends (that I have worn)


You know you all have committed fashion crimes.
I think the worst fashion crime I have ever committed... Shoulder Pads.
Who thought that woman actually looked feminine walking around dressed like 80 year old football players. I know why women stuffed their bras, but their shoulders... I don't get it. I really had no choice though, every shirt at Lerners, Gap or where ever, had shoulder pads sewn in. If you tried to rip them out, you would get little holes on the seems.

The next, jelly bracelets, tons of them. I don't know what the point of walking around with 20 multicolored rubber bands on my arm was, but it was cool at the time. Now in the 21st century, they have color codes for sex!! I can't believe that!! The codes are below.
Yellow - indicates the wearer is willing to HUG
Pink - indicates the wearer is willing to give a hickey
Orange - indicates the wearer is willing to KISS
Purple - indicates the wearer is willing to kiss a partner of either sex
Red - indicates the wearer is willing to perform a LAP DANCE
Green - indicates that ORAL SEX can be performed on a girl
Clear - indicates a willingness to do "whatever the snapper wants"
Blue - indicates ORAL SEX performed on a guy
Black - indicates that the wearer will have regular "missionary" sex
White - indicates the wearer will "FLASH" what they have
Glittery Yellow - indicates HUGGING and KISSING is acceptable
Glittery Pink - willing to "flash" (show) a body part
Glittery Purple - wearer is willing to French (open mouth) kiss
Glittery Blue - wearer is willing to perform anal sex
Glittery Green - indicates that the wearer is willing to "69" (mutual oral sex)
Glittery Clear - indicates that the wearer will let the snappee "feel up" or touch any body part they want


What about friendship necklaces? The ones where you had half the heart and your best girlfriend had the other half. Then when you didn't want to be friends anymore, one of you would throw the necklace back at the other girl.."you take it bitch!" and there was the end of a beautiful thing.

I'll try to post a pic of me this weekend from the 80's. Watch out for the BIG hair!