YOU KNOW WHAT ERKS ME

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Thinking about trading your man in????



Yeah so I was sitting at home the other day looking at my hubby and thought, I wonder what else is out there? (not really, but it makes for a good story line starter) So I decided to log on the net while my hubby was watching the Yanks on TV. With every curse word that came out of his mouth I felt more determined than ever. I thought that there had to be an easy way to find a man with out dating. So I thought "Mail order Husband"...it had to be the most perfect idea ever. I just spend a little cash (My current husbands money) and pick out the perfect man! If he pisses me off I can easily kick him out and get my money back! It sounded ideal. So I logged on and found that I could even chat to my new bo before I bought him. It wasn't easy but here is my perfect man ladies!!! His profile reads the following:

Name: Earl

I deal in reality...and the reality is that I'm ready for love. I can chop lots of wood and can even climb a greased pole. I keep in shape by chasing chickens around my back yard. I keep my self clean and take baths weekly. Country: West Virginia, U.S.A.

Now the greased pole had me a little worried...after all what man admits to liking "greased poles?" But yet again, I can get my money back!!! He said he is in shape, and he chases chickens, just so happens I love chicken. Then he mentioned he had a back yard, my bachelor is a little older but he has land, so if he kicks it a little early, I atleast have an inheritence. He keeps clean by taking baths....I love a nice hot bubble bath, I may need to get a slightly larger one, but that is a small price to pay for the perfect man. I must admit my mind was full of ideas when my now hubby called out "Honey, your favorite show is on, I made you a bowl of ice cream, why don't you come up and sit next to me while I rub your feet!"

I took one last look Earl, and said good-bye, but I have paid tribute to Earl with a song & video at the bottom!

Disclaimer, yeah I totally made this shit up...I love my hubby, he is the perfect man!

6 comments:

Someone that you wish you could meet... said...

...and I was going to tell you that I was a huge O's fan. But still a Sox fan thru and thru.

Have a nice day and thanks for the comment. Returning the flavor...LOL

1 Cup

Anonymous said...

Best part of the whole story is the disclaimer--funny stuff!

Anonymous said...

by the way, where did you get a picture of my dad?

Someone that you wish you could meet... said...

Ellie

Check out my post on
www.humanityprofanity.blogspot.com

I hope no hard feelings... :o)

I am out for the afternoon, enjoy your day.

HP101

Ellie said...

kudos!

Dick Small said...

While a greased pole IS a bonus, I still say you could do better (although he DOES keep himself clean, once a week). So I guess it's your call.