just gotta get this out...So b4 I got preggers I was really scared. See I never lost the baby weight from the last time. So I became afraid I would look more fat than pregnant. Turns out only after 7 weeks, my belly is rounding out alittle, so it isn't as bad as I thought it would be...BUT
I also thought I had escaped the horrible morning sickness that haunted me the last time. I am talking violent! I would break blood vessels in my eyes and my face from throwing up so harshly, and to top it off, I would throw my back out. Turned out they had a miracle medicine that was $1200 a bottle that fortunatley my insurance covered. Slowly but surely morning sickness is creeping its ugly head up on me. I have been rendered helpless lying on my side on the couch watching my two year old tear apart my house. But thankfully, my husband has been my miracle. I hope that lasts. (not the sickness)
I got a new hair do, but unfortunately b/c of all the hormones, it does nothing except lay there limp and emphasize the dark circles under my eyes and increasingly bad complextion.
And boy o boy am I tired. I think I could sleep all day. Then I get to dream about delivery day.
So all this brings me to my point:
If women go through all this and more, example hemoriods, constipation, c-section, incisions down there, recouping, and so on and so forth.... why is it so hard for men to consent to a vasectomy? Nowadays aren't like they used to be. It's not like I can have my tubes tied while they are 'down there'. They make you do a separate operation now. Why should I have to go through that as well , when the snip snip for guys is so much easier and less painful!
thoughts
36 comments:
Mine had it done, and you will be happy to hear that he even suggested it. After watching the first one being born and seeing how much pain I went thru, he told me, that when the time came and we were done, he would GLALY do it.
He is the first to admit that it wasn't even that bad. 2 days later he shoveled 5 yards of sand as it was back to the landscaping!!!
makes for a good story to tell at parties too!! lol
I told hubby we wouldn't have to tell a soul. It could be our little secret!
lol... my hubby and I have talked about this also... you're right Ellie, we DO go through a lot to give them their babies that we both enjoy but yep, we do all the work : )
My hubby was extremely reluctant and actually said he had heard its not good to have it done before you're in your 40's... I say...why? We are considering one more, making the grand total 3..(omg) and then FOR SURE thats it, so he and my cousin had a good talk on New Years over a few drinks as my cousin had it done about 12 years ago and said it was NO BIG DEAL. Must have made my husband feel better because he actually mentioned to me that after one more if thats the route we take he'll gladly snip his shit... after all, aren't guys more easily revearsed than females if he ever changed his mind??? ( Not like I'd have another one after 3 though!!
haha, your "dirty little secret"?? lol, I LOVE THOSE!
hubby knows about this post and he says geesh, the 2nd one isn't out yet and your already talkin bout cutting my balls off!
silly rabbit, I won't be cutting your balls off, just disconnecting them!
Disabling the thing...er, things, that provide visual confirmation of all our efforts in sexual activities either with ourselves or others, isn't a pleasant concept to grasp. It's emasculating. We know it's all in our heads and no one else really cares, but we do. And since we're chauvinist pigs, our opinion is all that matters ;)
Besides, nothing, nothing hurts more than a swift kick/punch to the balls. Even a good flick is enough to make us cringe! If we're afraid of a finger, imagine how comfortable we are with the idea of having a knife and scissors down there!
I haven't had it done, but I seriously doubt it's as simple as "disconnecting them."
Oh dear oh dear woozie...my sweet young impressionable woozie...that is what they have anesthesia for. If you think that is uncomfortable, try being 2 weeks late, bloated, irritable, finally going into labor only to be told the hospital is full so you have to wait several hours at home, then when you get there you go 8 more hours without any anesthesia, ya finally give in b/c you aren't progressing at all only to have some half ass doctor from shady grove put your epidural in wrong so the only thing numb is your left leg then they up your meds to make your contractions harder and longer and you stay that way for about 29 hours total only to have to give in to a c-section which you deliver an 8lb 6oz baby but are taken from him to go to recovery, still paralyzed from the anesthesia forgotten about by nurses so you have to swallow your vomit 3 times before you can scream for help....
yeah, I think my hubby will see things my way.
Man that took alot outta me :)
ah yes, but it is alot less painful then having your tubes tied.
Like, how wimpy are we sounding?
Mine had it done, and you know what he remembers the most...the shaving of his balls...so take some advice here and now...shave them at home first.
At the hospital, they dry shave them and them use 2-sided tape to get any scragglers...no anesthesia is even used...a small needle is given and then it numbles everything. A small incision is made and they actually cauterized the tubes that deliver the sperm. The whole thing took 10 minutes tops...if it can be done in a DR's office for crying out loud, how terrible can it be. It's all because it involves their penis....FREUD wins again!!!
I don't know there nic...that last comment made me a little squirmy!!!
Still I have no sympathy. My dad had it done. I think it takes a real man to stand up for his wife like that!!!
yes, a real man for sure, or at most a man who wants to have sex with his wife again
lol
I have a good Vas story, but I will wait until you are all done and Mike's is done too...it's not a gross story, a bad ending, just pretty funny about what my hubby's friend went thru
my cousin said after he had it done he met his (now) wife the next day and they screwed that night... lol, he said it only hurt because she was boucning off his balls but other than that, the procedure as well as the recovery were A-O-K.
Sorry, maybe TMI but he made it sound like a walk in the park.
looks like the women out number the men...but really it is the man's decision...I think that is what's so frustrating. It's not like one of us can choose to have the baby. Both of us can decide to create another baby but let's face it, only one of us is pushing the melon out!
and the one doing the pushing also can make the decision to keep her legs shut after the delivery as well...:)
To me, it isn't just the man's decision, it should be a joint decision by the couple.
I guess you can also keep popping them out and after 2 or 3 and your hubby sees how expensive they are to raise, he just may cut them off himself!!! lol
as for the comment that Ice said that he hubby said he heard before 40, it is harmful, I looked into it and found no evidence. But I did find some info questioning that women that have tubals may have a harder menopause....so that is something to think of as well
my mother went through hard menopause man....I don't want any of that!
but that is another point...women also have to go through menopause...hot flashes, mood swings, see it is only fair!
lol my mother calls it mentalpause, she's just starting it now. She can say it about herself, but she'll be damned if anyone says it about her!
LOL
i know it's mean but, when ever my mother goes postal I say to her, "did you forget to take your pills today". I know it won't be so funny when my kids say it to me!
Nic,
aha, you looked into it, I never bothered... but to be honest it appeared to me to be something out of thin air to try and deflect the converstation, lol... knew it!
... and yes, I think it should also be a "joint" decission as if affects both of you.
When it comes to labour, ask the man to pull a football out of his nostril and tell you its no big deal : )
or a step up, Ellie.
"you're either one meds, or you need to be "
lol, so bad.
Ellie:
When my Wife and I were just BF/GF, we were talking about post-children birth control with another Couple. My Bud was dead-set against it, and said there was "no way" he would ever have a "V." He said (I still cannot believe this ...) that his Wife could have a tubal ligation after their last child arrived.
I piped-in and said:
"Why would you subject your Wife to major surgery, when you could have an out-patient procedure and lay in bed for four days?"
Needless to say, he was pissed-off at me.
Needless to say, his Wife had the TL after #4 arrived.
Further and needless to say, I have the Vasecectomy six months after our youngest was delivered. I stayed in bed with frozen peas for four days and my Bride happily waited on me. I was back in "Action" within one week. I have never regretted it, and the only thing that went wrong for me, was not enough local anasthetic in the early part. After more Local A, I never felt a thing.
My Dad had the "V" back in 1964 (after my Birth) when it was illegal in Canada.
Guys who refuse the procedure are either craven arseholes, or bastards - in my opinion. Having the "V" is one of the MOST Gentlemanly things a MAN can do.
Wifey avoids major surgery, can go off the Pill (reducing Cancer risks), and we can have wanton couplings with no inconvenience.
What could possibly be wrong with that?
Additionally, I strongly suspect that my Friend's Wife respects and admires me for being more of a Man than her Husband (who is my Best Friend). I still cannot believe that he made her have a TL after FOUR (4) vaginal deliveries. What a prick.
Hey I made a small thread asking what any of the men that visit my blog think on the big V...drop in and read, I think you will be pleasantly surprised!!!
Ellie:
When my Wife and I were just BF/GF, we were talking about post-children birth control with another Couple. My Bud was dead-set against it, and said there was "no way" he would ever have a "V." He said (I still cannot believe this ...) that his Wife could have a tubal ligation after their last child arrived.
I piped-in and said:
"Why would you subject your Wife to major surgery, when you could have an out-patient procedure and lay in bed for four days?"
Needless to say, he was pissed-off at me.
Needless to say, his Wife had the TL after #4 arrived.
Needless to say, I have the Vasecectomy six months after our youngest was delivered. I stayed in bed with frozen peas for four days and my Bride happily waited on me. I was back in "Action" within one week. I have never regretted it, and the only thign that went wrong for me, was not enough local anasthetic in the early part. After more Local, I never felt a thing.
My Dad had the "V" back in 1964 (after my Birth) when it was illegal in Canada.
Guys who refuse the procedure are either craven arseholes, or bastards - in my opinion. Having the "V" is one of the MOST Gentlemanly things a MAN can do.
Wifey avoids major surgery, can go off the Pill (reducing Cancer risks), and we can have wanton couplings with no inconvenience.
What could possibly be wrong with that?
Additionally, I strongly suspect that my Friend's Wife respects and admires me for being more of a Man than her Husband (who is my Best Friend). I still cannot believe that he made her have a TL after FOUR (4) vaginal deliveries. What a prick.
I had my tubes tied, not burned though. Was in for an infected gallbladder and they offered to tie me up at the same time. i said wahooo yuppers, but is it more pain, the doctor said no more than the gallbladder. Either way if that didn't happen hubby would of done it sooner or later I can nag with the best of them :).
The only thing that hurt for me was the DNC, that was painful. The doctor figured since he was there he'd check me for cancer stuff and did the DNC,, I was clear phew...
I regret doing it though but not enough to keep me awake at night, just when I'm around a newborn.
Ellie you will lose the weight don't worry, baby time is all about them when they are a couple of years old you can have time to look at yourself again.
I did low carb (NOT NO CARB) just low and it turns out I was a pig on bread so it worked lol. Cut out the bread and I lost weight.
Just remember you are beautiful no matter what is on the outside...
I'll send you pics if you like lol.
Sorry for the double-post.
Blogger was slow ...
Yeah I think it is only fair...and sometimes nessecary. My brother in law has 4 children by 4 different women. Don't get me wrong, he is a good guy, he just has demonic sperm. He can't possibly afford another baby, but refuses to get it done. I really don't see what the big deal is. You don't dry up..
SO??!!!
Does your hubby feel better about the idea, now?
I had a poster come on and say he went bowling the same night!!!
He hasn't been by yet. I was too exhausted to even move yesterday. Couldn't keep anything down either.
Ain't no knives, needles, or rolls of duct tape going anywhere near my crotch, unless that doc wants to throw down.
I was 31 years old, and my fourth child had just been born when I went for the snip. I did not want my wife to endure a surgery when we could achieve the same results by my having a vasectomy which I realized would be a far simpler procedure.
I can understand your husband resisiting it, but he has plenty of time to give it consideration and come around. :-)
lol @ demonic sperm...
Hubby had one after the third one was 6 months old. We agreed to it before we were married - over a decade ago (daym, it doesn't seem that long). He didn't take the pain medicine, he didn't whine, he was one hell of a trooper!
I have a deep and unending respect for ANY man that will have a vasectomy. It takes a lot of guts to admit you don't want (more?) kids. It takes even bigger chihones to put it into practice and go see the doc.
Hubby was in and out in less than an hour. He was sore for about 2 days after but fine from then on. It really is an "office procedure". The only thing I'd change is requiring the wife to be present. Hello?!? It's his wennie, I don't have a say on him getting a snip-snip just like he doesn't have a say in my getting a tubal ligation done.
Short of that, more power to ya MAN! :D
eeew now see I couldn't be present...no way
Oh, no. Sorry, you don't have to be there for the procedure. They make you have a meeting with the doc in advance (about a week or so beforehand). Then your wife has to come in with you and agree to getting the job done. I don't think a man can tell a woman to have an abortion or a kid, so a woman doesn't have a right to tell a man about having a vasectomy done.
Sorry, didn't mean to confuse you or gross you out. :D
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